Food for Talk: Card 1, A daring adventure

28 Sep

“Life is a daring adventure, or nothing.” – Helen Keller
Would you describe your life as a daring adventure? Why or why not? What could you change or add to your life to make it a daring adventure?” 

Hmm…I definitely wouldn’t say my life is a daring adventure, but it’s getting better. I think I’ve been methodical and planned out for that. I basically had my whole life planned out by the time I was 15 and it looked like this: graduate from high school, graduate from college, graduate from law school, realize that’s a terrible plan, decide to then go to grad school for my master’s in library science, move to Charlotte, find a spouse (somewhere in those years), have some kids, be a stay-at-home mom, subtly become my mother, turn 30.

…Well, I’m 30. Most of that came true, and here’s what I found out: I would have hated law school, I still think I’m glad I got my MLS (although since I don’t think my life’s goal is to be a librarian, the jury’s still out on that one, but since i can’t figure out what I would rather be doing, it’s not a bad way to go and I still have my master’s!) I’ve been in Charlotte 6 years, been a librarian for 5, and I’m itching to do something a little different. But I’m still figuring out what that is. I’m still single, and haven’t even had a hint of finding someone who would be a good life partner. I only recently realized that with turning 30 (which apparently is the magic year for me), I might very well be alone for quite a while. It’s the one thing I am unable to control, which is why my poor ex-boyfriends have been so miserable…I’ve tried to subconsciously shoehorn them into being my future husband within weeks of meeting them. Who can live up to that pressure? And this is no tale of woe here–just an observation of what my life might be like (and I don’t see myself having kids without a partner, period). So I’ve got to start living for me, fully. Which, frankly, is kind of scary. But exciting. I’m in control of my future. So maybe now is the time to embrace the adventure? Nothing ventured, nothing gained, etc. etc.

So…changes I would make (well, ones that I’m considering):
~ as soon as it opens, I’m applying for a senior librarian position in a totally different area in my department. Big move, big change, but it would definitely shake me up. And I assume it come with a raise!
~ thinking about going to an open mike night and singing. I think I have a pretty good voice (I don’t know what my competition is!), but I need to see what (and who) else is out there, and Ii need to get a song list together. I think it would be a fun side project.
~ thinking about writing a book. Not fiction, per se, but maybe a sex and the city-type memoir? Maybe I could do freelance columns. I certainly have the ridiculous dating history to back it up. It’s something that’s bouncing around in my head. Thanks to Natalie for planting the idea that keeps bugging me at random times!
~ continue and expand my spiritual growth. I’m starting to do this, but I haven’t been particularly bold in it. I probably need to put myself out there a little more, give more of myself, do more service. Still, I’ve taken steps, and I feel like I’m on the right path.

Basically, I think the most I can do to make my life a daring adventure is to eliminate the apathy in my life. I like being comfortable, and that comfort makes me lazy. But I’ve wasted (although that word sounds harsh to me, but you know what I mean) a lot of time planning for a life that currently is not my life. So–scrap that, and start over with a new plan. But damnation, if scrapping 15 years of a plan isn’t scary, then what is?? It’s time to get moving!


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